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September 2025
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Negotiating with Insight: How to Read the Person Across from You
The Devil You Know: Reading Others in Negotiation
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Hi there,
Some people think good negotiators are good because they're persuasive. I think it's because they're perceptive.
If you can read the person on the other side of the conversation—spot what drives them, what slows them down, what makes them hesitate—you have an edge. Not because you're manipulating them, but because you're speaking their language.
This month, we're diving into the OCEAN Big 5 Personality Traits not to talk about you, but to talk about them—your counterpart, your manager, your client, your stakeholder. The person you're trying to reach. When you understand their tendencies, you can adapt your timing, your tone, and your approach. That's how you create agreements that work for both sides.
Let's get into it.
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📚 OCEAN Big 5 Personality Traits
Understanding your counterpart's personality to negotiate more effectively
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The OCEAN model breaks personality down into five traits:
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O
Openness – how curious and open to new ideas they are
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C
Conscientiousness – how structured and detail-focused they are
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E
Extraversion – how much they thrive on interaction and visibility
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A
Agreeableness – how cooperative or competitive they are
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N
Neuroticism – how much they react emotionally to stress. I know that is an unfortunate word, "neuroticism."
In negotiation, these traits are like clues. If you can spot them, you can predict how someone might respond—and adjust accordingly.
For example:
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• High Extraversion? Schedule a live discussion instead of relying on email.
• Low Agreeableness? Expect more pushback and prepare multiple options.
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If you'd like to explore your own OCEAN profile—so you can better see where others differ—take the quiz here:
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🤝 Collaboration with Alpian Bank's SmartPurse x NegotiateHer
Financial knowledge to back up your negotiation goals
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We're partnering with SmartPurse, a financial platform created to help women take control of their money with confidence. Through their courses and tools—developed in collaboration with Alpian Bank—you can build the financial knowledge to back up your negotiation goals.
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CHF 50 off our Strategic Negotiation course
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As part of our collaboration, you'll get CHF 50 off our Strategic Negotiation course.
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🚶♀️ Event Spotlight: Walk & Talk — September 24, Zurich, 6 p.m.
Fresh air, new perspectives, and real conversation
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After the success of our first Walk & Talk this spring, we're back for a fall edition in Zurich.
Join us on Wednesday, September 24 at 6 p.m. for an easy, social walk with real conversation—about negotiation, careers in Switzerland, and anything else on your mind. Fresh air, new perspectives, and a chance to connect in person.
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🎙️ Podcast Update: Now on YouTube!
Episode 6: Using OCEAN to read others in negotiation
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Our latest episode—Episode 6—is all about using OCEAN to read others in negotiation.
And for the first time, we're launching on YouTube. If you prefer to watch and follow along with captions or transcripts, this one's for you.
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Choose the person you will be negotiating with most this month.
Write down what you think their OCEAN profile might be. As you interact, look for clues that confirm or change your assessment—and adjust your approach accordingly.
Understanding personality traits isn't about manipulation—it's about connection.
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From Me to You
Reading people isn't about becoming a mind reader—it's about becoming a better listener. When you understand what drives someone, you can find the common ground that makes negotiation feel less like a battle and more like a conversation.
The OCEAN framework gives you a starting point, but remember: every person is unique. Use these insights as a guide, not a rulebook. The goal is connection, not categorization.
Thank you for being part of this community. Every conversation you have, every insight you share, every person you help—you're making negotiation more human, one interaction at a time.
With clarity and care,
Gitanjali
Chief NegotiateHer
P.S. Have a story about reading someone in negotiation?
Hit reply—I read every message.
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Connect with us
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Stand up for yourself, and if you can, stand up for others.
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If you ever need us, we'll be here—no need to negotiate that. 🤍
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Watch SmartPurse Introduction
Listen on Spotify
Listen on Apple Podcasts
